Can I just say that we serve an awesome GOD? I have been struggling with various issues related to my personal life lately and it has been such an eye opening process. He continuously draws me closer through trials in my life. Even today, while I was driving to April's for LOST night, I was crying out to GOD asking Him for guidance and direction in a very delicate situation. I asked Him, "Lord, guide my steps and my thoughts. Help me to see your will. Please open or close this door as a result of the conversation this evening. I tried to do this on my own but you are my ultimate strength and I pray that I will FINALLY learn how to use that strength."
I was so broken as I drove down the road.....feeling like I was driving to nowhere...and fast. I know everyone thinks that I have a good life, one filled with little stress living at home with virtually no bills, one where I have no kids and "no responsibilities" other than work. However, reality bites sometimes and most people don't realize what I go through.
Don't get me wrong....I love my family and I wouldn't trade them for anything....I love living at home and having a good life where I feel safe. Things are just different. I am not trying to bad mouth anyone here because we are to get the log out of our own eye before we remove it from someone else. I am simply trying to say that I put up a front way too often...one that is there for others and one that tries to be strong for everyone else.
I'm sorry this post is such a downer but I had to get that out. As a follow up to my prayer in the car, I did have an important conversation tonight and I can honestly say that I don't see the door as closed.....at least not yet. God is so good and gracious to take care of His people when they ask. He always knows just the perfect answer. I just hope that one day I truly learn the meaning of being grateful for the wondrous work He has done on the cross, the sacrifice He made for us miserable sinners, and the love that He seeks to give each of us.
Oh yeah.....any prayers you can spare would be so appreciated.....
Romans 8:32 - He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?
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